SO...my wedding was October 11, 2008 and I found out 3 weeks before the wedding that I was pregnant! So...here I am 6 months pregnant with a little girl. We are so excited and cannot wait to meet our little Addison Faith.
Being pregnant has definitely been a test of will and strength for me. When I hear women say they love being pregnant--I wonder if they truly love being pregnant--or because they are now mothers of children whom they love--they look back on the experience as a pleasant one? Maybe a little of both. I can't exactly share the sentiment that I love being pregnant...but what I can share is that I love the child growing inside of me. It isn't something I can easily explain because it is strange loving someone whom you have never met--but I feel her moving around and I know she is there--THAT IS DEFINITELY EVIDENT IN MY GROWING GIGANTIC stomach!
As much as I don't like looking at the scale and seeing it creep up--after a year of diligently working to lose weight and get into shape--and as much as I don't like looking pale--(yes, I know tanning is bad--but I do enjoy having a little color on my skin)--and as much as I feel pain--I still wouldn't trade having the opportunity or loving Addison or being her mommy.
I think it is funny that my last post was about a book on self-image, when I seem to be having a lot of self-image issues right now! Last night, I got home around 9:15pm and I glanced in the mirror by my front door and this is the image I saw standing before me:
That's right Mama Fratelli from The Goonies was staring back at me! I had the greasy hair, the haggard,worn expression, the pasty white skin, and a very defeated look of despair on my face. My husband assures me that I don't really look like this--but I feel like I do. I feel like I am pregnant ALL over my body--I can see it in my face, my belly, my chest...everywhere. So I have decided to channel all of this despair into love for Addison and to start working on a plan. I know I won't be able to jump right back into my 5:30am boot camp work-outs, but I plan on starting slow and working my way back into it--Weight Watchers is the best $40.00 a month I ever spent and I will certainly be giving them a call after Addison arrives. Having a plan makes me feel a little less "Fratelli." In the meantime I will have to settle for a new haircut and an eyebrow waxing!
4 comments:
Glad to see you're writing again!
I mean, you do have a blog. Might as well, right?
And for the record, you do NOT look like that "Goonies" character!
I love the Goonies picture...but you do not look like that woman! I understand your sentiments about being pregnant...it is not something that I can say that I love, however I DO LOVE LOVE LOVE Vera and Lane so it makes up for it all.
Keep up with the bloggging!
KRISTEN!!!! You do NOT look like Fratelli! You're so beautiful in your beach pic that you took with Mary. I felt just like you when I was pregnant, trust me.
All that matters is that the baby gets here safely and that you have a man who thinks you're beautiful pregnant or not :)
Thanks for the uplifting words---you guys are very sweet.
Post a Comment